So below is a clip where a group of women have decided the best way to garner favorable results from men is to hold out on sex. The men are committing violent acts to other groups and the women want them to stop - so they are going to hold out on sex. Here are a few issues with that asinine idea:
* If a man doesn't regularly release semen, testosterone will build in his body. Testosterone is the chemical that makes men more aggressive. This is why as a fighter, I never have sex about 2 months before a fight. In effect, not having sex is NOT a good idea to make man less aggressive
* This solution should be manifested via thought and the exercise of the mind, not regressed to the primal need of sexual gratification. Physical gratification is soooo temporary and will only cause more issues down the road.
All in all I think its a juvenile approach to a very adult issue. And woman have the nerve to say that men only think with their penis...lmao
Watch the clip and share your thoughts.
Embedded video from CNN Video
What the hell is wrong with the world?? Come ON now...
ReplyDeleteFor me, sex is a beautiful bond between a man and a woman and can make or break a relationship in some cases.
And I, personally, would expect MORE sex from my man if he was out doing something I didn't like. I'd make a calendar and everything. LOL! "Okay, you can have Tues and Thurs to do whatever nonsense you want to do... but Mon/Wed/Fri AND weekends you'll be handcuffed to the bed. Coo'?"
HA!! If only ALL woman thought like you - hehe. No but seriously the approach is just plain silly. In my mind, I would think that holding out deprives "both" of us...
ReplyDeleteWhatever the issue is it should be handled like adults. Taking sex away from me is treating me like a child. In addition if I do something wrong is a woman rebuttal "tit for tat"?
The way I see it is - If you keep your man busy 'tween the sheets, he won't have TIME to fight or even think about anything going on around him. Put. It. On. Him!!
ReplyDeleteAnd Dimitri, you're right about the aggression. In high school, I used to think it was a rumor when people would say the basketball and football coaches told their players not to have sex two days prior to a game, but it's very true! Like you and fighting, that aggression builds up. And these poor women may just get pimp-slapped. *sigh*
This is the dumbest thing I've ever heard. Hold out on sex to CURB aggression? Wow... that's all I can really say. Not only is it dumb, but it's the quickest way to get cheated on. No sex for peace? What? Me personally have never seen a man more peaceful than after he's had a release. But maybe that's just me...
ReplyDeleteA married womans body belongs to her husband, and vice versa. It is ungodly to withhold sex from your spouse. And single women should not be giving it away like that. But taking matters such as these into ones own hands can only cause more problems.
ReplyDeleteWas the clip posted, or only referenced?
ReplyDeleteVic, not sure I follow. The clip is in this entry...
ReplyDeleteHad to empty the 'cache' and start over...a mere delay in my posted response.
ReplyDeleteWhile I don't, necessarily, support their approach, one needs to understand the foundation leading to this point. These women are seeking a path to impact change in their homeland, to make a better way for their children. In a country where it is taboo to openly discuss sex and a country where it is the husband's right / wife's obligation to submit to sex, this is a powerful statement. The power of one is to do something...they are doing that within the power they have. Will it result in the change they seek...doubtful. Will it work in America, definitely not! Is it of interest...lol...no!
First, we can never compare American sexuality with any other country's sexuality. Americans are much more closed minded when it comes to sex.
ReplyDeleteI think it is interesting that these women have come to this decision. I have found that withholding sex normally doesn't get you the results that you are looking for. Whereas giving sex will get those desired results much faster. When someone is fulfilled and happy they are much more likely to give you what you want or at least compromise. When you are miserable, frustrated and tense just the opposite is true.
From a political stance, I think they have reached a level of desperation. I can't imagine living the life that they are living. It makes me wonder what solution I would have come up with.
Dimitri, Interesting your perception of my lack of understanding of Kenyan practice. You view a narrowly channeled post and equally narrow response as a foundation for all of what these women live / endure, and your assumption of my knowledge / experience. This issue far surpasses that of withholding sex, and is so much more about cultural and political circumstance.
ReplyDeleteYour post was focused solely on the issue of 'sex', or lack thereof in this case, as seen from the male perspective, not on the understanding of male/female relationships in Kenya. However, since you've meandered down this path, let's discuss.
You are correct, traditionally Kenyan marriages have been signed, sealed and delivered through exchange of a 'bride price' from the man to a woman's (girl's) family. Technically, this does not constitute a dowry (what the woman brings to the marriage). Each is done to solidify the seriousness of the bind.
With that said, traditionally, women's rights in Kenyan society have come through her husband. Women must have the consent of their husband to hold ID cards, have been subjected to 'disciplinary action' by their husband and shunned for reporting abuse. Polygamy exists and is practiced to fulfill a man's need / lust, and women typically lose familial property if she chooses to leave her husband and/or if/when he dies. A woman is, traditionally, unable to hold office, is subject to rape if she does not consent to sex by her husband (which is overlooked in most courts), risks ostracizing or death of her children if not the preferred sex and may be 'returned' to her family if she is sub par in the bedroom. Typically, women are not educated above the primary level as seat space is saved for males. As well, within the same 'tight' family units, family members, many times, condemn and remove women from their homes if/when the husband dies. They are forced to live in despicable conditions and must fight for what they can for themselves and their children.
Lastly, my reference to "power' was not literal. I was alluding to was the ability of one person to begin / impact a path to change. You are correct in that power is about attitude, confidence and carriage. Again, within this culture, women have not been provided a platform, typically, to develop impact change. Their recourse, or path, is limited in their world.
Consequently, from what perspective / platform do Kenyan women have to become a voice for change? Again, and as I stated above, I don't support the foundation from which they attempt change; however, it is easy to understand the underlying 'why' behind their attempt.
"Polygamy is still practiced to fulfill a mans lust"? This is just empahisinmg my point about true understanding of certain culture's idelaology.
ReplyDeleteUgggg...I am going to let this one go. Till next time....
Last thought...the understanding of polygamy in said culture exists...perhaps a bit of western sentiment may have seeped in. A character flaw, perhaps!
ReplyDeleteAh, well I encourage you to deter that sentiment and devise a new more well rounded cortex of thought.
ReplyDeleteWestern ideology is an iota of what "real life" is actually made of and without counter knowledge it will mental stifle creative thinking.
Polygamy is practiced so the men always has someone to take care of the household (taking care of kids, cooking, cleaning, etc.) in case one wife is away. But the men must treat each wife equally - especially when it comes to the bedroom! So taking on more wives is actually a more common practice among the wealthy.
ReplyDelete(God I love National Geographic.. .I'm such a nerd.)
WHO the fuck would want more than one wife?
ReplyDelete.... Just sayin'. lol
Anyone who is NOT controlled by western philosophy. Remember the US is one of the few countries that does NOT endorse polygamy. Polygamy is not about sex of fulfilling a mans lust, its about strengthening the family unit.
ReplyDeleteisn't that what I said above? lol
ReplyDeleteOH.. lol. The other comment was just a jeer at women being particularly annoying to men. :D
ReplyDeleteI actually like the idea of a polygamist family unit. I have never been to keen on the idea of having only one person to fulfill all of your needs. I could very easily see myself married to a man and that man and I deciding on taking in another wife. I would welcome the help it takes in raising a very well balanced family and still being able to pursue my career. We live in a world where we want it all. We want the white picket fence and the karate lessons for the kids and the high power career and all that jazz. We want everything when it is simply not possible to have everything at once. I would love the chance to be able to have my career as well as being able to run a very well balance, functioning family. For me, it wouldn't be about making sure my man was fulfilled as it would be that we were meeting the needs of all of the members of our family. I want to have a woman to share my life with. I want the ability to know that if I'm not home to cook a meal that someone is. I have never much understood why Americans were so opposed to this idea. And I certainly have no idea why it is criminal activity here.
ReplyDeleteSatch, your mindset transcends normalcy and a very skewed western philosophy. Welcome to the Duke Side (Darth Vader laugh). I give you kudos for not only at least having an open mind, but for further having a stance in what you believe.
ReplyDeleteAs I have noted and research supports, "western" society is one of the few culture groups outside of polygamy and actually the smallest opposition of it.
In consideration of your mindset, read this post and comment accordingly...
http://www.dimitrisnowden.com/blog/?p=78
Satchmania - you have my full respect. Even though that wouldn't be my cup of tea, I highly respect people with such an open mind that understand the world today.
ReplyDeleteI have no idea why it's considered criminal either. Kind of like gay marriage being (still!) so taboo.
Speaking of taboo - you all should check out National Geographic's episode of Taboo on marriage. It's very interesting and thought provoking.