I was recently asked why I LOVE porn by an apparent anti-pornography activist and their like-minded brethren as she lamented the availability and pervasiveness of pornography, ostensibly because porn ruins relationships, objectifies women, and gives rise to sex crimes - BLAH. The same chick that probably hasn't had an orgasm in her entire life...
But if you look at demographic and crime data since the rise of the Internet — when most people could for the first time access pornography at any time, from any place, completely anonymously — there’s little evidence at all that it’s having any widespread negative effects in any of the areas people anti-porn watchers worry about. In fact, trends in just about every conceivable area are moving in directions you’d think anti-porn watchers would favor, despite the widespread availability or pornography. Hell, given that most of the bad stuff seemed to peak just as the Internet took off before trending downward, you could arguably make the case that porn is helping matters a bit, by giving the sexually frustrated a harmless outlet to relieve sexual tension (how’s that for a euphemism?)
I tried to think of all the areas in which anti-porn watchers might conclude pornography is having negative effects, and looked to see what the trends in those areas have looked like since the early-to-mid 1990s, the onset of the Internet age. Perhaps I’ve overlooked something, but my guess is that just about any other category you could come up with would point in the same direction: Things are getting better, not worse. Despite Janet Jackson, Internet porn, and Desperate Housewives.
What I found:
Sex crimes against children: Down 39% overall in the last decade. Crimes against 12-17 year olds are down 79% over the same period.
Abortion: The number of abortions per live births has trended downward since 1987. That year, there were 356 abortions per 1,000 live births. By 2001 — the last year for which the federal government has data — the number had dropped to 247.
Teen pregnancy: The number of live births per 1,000 women aged 15-19 has dropped from 60 in 1990 to 40 in 2003.
Divorce: The percentage of marriages ending in divorce has dropped from 47% in 1990 to 38% in 2002.
Crimes Against Women: Violent crime against women has dropped from 41 victims per 1,000 women in 1994 to just 17 in 2004.
Rape: Incidence of rape has dropped dramatically, despite decreasing social stigma against rape victims, which would make rape more likely to be reported. There were 2.5 rapes per 1,000 women in 1984. By 1993, the number had dropped to 1.6. By 2004, it was down to just 0.4.
Now of course one could argue that all of the above was due to expensive campaigns, clever marketing and strategies to help fix…but in my eyes there is a symmetric correlation to porn and its growing availability. We all have sex and masturbate with ourselves all the time and all day - so why is it bad to watch it on TV or the computer? Who cares?
I think its great and natural and truly wish it was endorsed and supported. People are so cynical when it comes to the things that turn them on. There is no such thing as "weird". It just is. Bondage, fisting, fruit, bestiality, gay, hermaphrodites - its all good so long as no one gets hurt and babies aren't involved.
Cumming is WONDERFUL!!
D, interesting piece. I agree, porn is a wonderful thing. Having a healthy sex life can decrease stress, lower your risk for heart problems, and overall, make you a happier person. And when you do not have a partner to have sex with on a regular basis, porn can be the medium that holds you over until you can get the real thing.
ReplyDeleteI will have to disagree on the beastiality part though. Sex should be an act between consenting partners. Animals can not give consent, so therefore, should be left out of the equation. Everything else, gets my vote.
D, two points --
ReplyDelete1.) Why is it that the woman you reference having had the conversation with has to be 'the woman who hasn't had an orgasm her entire life' rather than someone who thinks different from you? I don't agree with her position, but she is entitled to her beliefs as long as she doesn't try to impose them on others. As well, the world can't and shouldn't be filled w/ like minded people...would be quite dull. I do believe she had the right to ask her question, but so, too, did you have the right to respond 'because it's my choice' and ask her simply not to share her opinion with you...although that would not have sent you in search of the statistics from which we may draw indirect correlations to porn.
2.) My personal belief is that if it works for you, so be it, it's your choice. I don't believe the whole world, particularly those in our professional world, need to know certain details of our personal lives. They just don't, each of us has a line, whether it''s leisure time activities or sexual wants / needs....Personally, I don't need to know if you are between partners and need a porn fix, but I don't mind if it works for you.
@ Satch, I agree and on the beast part as well. All in all, what ever gets you off - go for it!!
ReplyDelete@ Vic, 1. Because she hasn't had an orgasm and truly hasn't explored "her self". For me not a matter of like minded or imposition of perspective. The bigger picture is that she amongst other limits them selves and never get to love live via an optimized perspective of self.
ReplyDelete2. I hear you - but what does the "professional" knowledge of ones sexual preferences matter? Again my point is that if porn were more "normal" in the US your comment would be void. For example its very normal to have meetings and collaborations in a restaurant that servers high end food with people having sex as the center piece. You very statement emulates my point on the lack of embrace on a very natural act seemingly endorsed anywhere else other than the US.
I don't agree with you, D. "Shitting' is a very normal act but I don't choose to watch everyone doing so in a public setting. Sex is very normal and embraced, but I don't choose to have it part of my board meeting and/or conversations that are of a business nature. In part, because of the distraction it would create, similarly to other venues of normal activity that would not be conducive to conducting business. There are enough distractions that minimize quality and pride in today's professional world, we don't need to add another.
ReplyDeleteAs well, I've traveled the world extensively and conducted business meetings in multiple countries, but never in a setting where sex was the centerpiece. I've been, experienced, enjoyed and would return to establishments for which such was a centerpiece, but not as part of a business setting.
Very risqué Dimitri!!!! I think sex is definitely more stigmatized in the United States than in many other countries, but that is what it is. Your statistics are interesting! I never thought to attribute the decline in certain sex crimes or familial affairs like teen pregnancy and divorce to pornography! I will admit that in the past, I didn't engage in watching porn due to my own personal views about it, stemmed from what society told me was inappropriate, but since reaching adulthood and creating my own ideologies about the world around me, sex is one of those areas that I too, agree should be embraced more openly. Why should we be ashamed of something that makes us happy and keeps us healthy (if acted upon responsibly, of course!) Now publicly, that IS a separate debate. Even in a country viewed as overly sexual (such as Brasil), there are not people taking to the streets to engage in sex on a daily basis for all the world to see. I am not saying it never happens, but there are certain rules and norms that govern (some of) us. I will say that I think it's absurd that graphic murder by our government or by our citizens is okay to be viewed by the general public in the cinemas or on TV, but porn is ostracized and sneered upon regardless of the outlet, usually in the privacy of one's home on video or the internet! Fascinating how our values are prioritized!
ReplyDelete@ Taj....I've gathered from previous things you've said that you are in education. How might it work for you to take 'sex' and your view of, and sharing of, porn in to your educational world? Free to talk openly, share, make the children more aware and comfortable with? How will your parents feel. Do you disagree with my beliefs around its appropriateness in the 'board room' if you willl? Just curious?
ReplyDelete@ Satch....share your thoughts regarding your child's teacher / school leader bringing sex / porn in to the school? Where do you draw the line of appropriateness?
ReplyDelete@ Victoria- how does sex education even factor into this conversation? Or are you asking how I would feel if my son's teacher turned on a porno for the class to watch as entertainment? I'm just not sure I am following your line of questioning.
ReplyDelete@ Christen- Do you mean you ARE against porn strip clubs, but not internet porn? I believe that's what you are saying but I don't want to assume. Your post states differently.
ReplyDelete@ Christen, you are very welcome! Just FYI its not sex that makes things stressful, its the reality and "truths" shared or not between involved parties that makes things stressful. What is the true difference between video and "real-life"? What difference does the medium of reference truly make when it comes to observing porn?
ReplyDelete@ Vic, Not sure what porn and your question to sex ed have in common...
@Taj, Glad you are "opening up" and at least open to learning self and potential new levels of stimulation...
Wow!!!!! I can't bellieve you all thougth I was referencing sex ed and porn with children.....beyond me!
ReplyDelete@ Victoria. So I take it you are speaking of my son's teacher actually having porn in the school building as opposed to playing it for the kids in class. IN this case, I would be against a teacher bring a dvd into the school building that has porn on it. Now, if the teacher was in the teachers lounge, and was looking at porn on their personal computer, then not a big deal to me. We are all sexual beings. Personally, I wouldn't whip out my vibrator and go to town while I am sitting at my desk working, But would I go home for a quickie at lunch, sure. Would I have sex with my man or woman on a break, sure. The key to it, is to not make others feel uncomfortable. I wouldn't come back to work and give a play by play on what I did during my break, but if a co-worker was comfortable enough to have that conversation with me, then I wouldn't feel embarrassed or shy about my actions. I am a very sexual person and those that know, know how to take me.
ReplyDelete@ Victoria, i guess your question was a bit confusing. It sounded as if you were referencing how I would discuss my personal beliefs about sex with my students and how I would expect my parents to react. If you would clarify what you were asking, I can offer a more aligned response...
ReplyDeleteLOL
To all....not necessary to continue the discussion. Thanks.
ReplyDeleteAww, Victoria! Don't be like that! You were misunderstood, that's all...
ReplyDelete@ Vic - party pooper! Just try to explain your point...either we are all retarded or just need you to break it down for us...
ReplyDelete@Vic, what's wrong? I rather enjoy our conversations on here. It's no fun if we all agree and have the same points. You add a unique perspective and I would be disappointed for you to end the convo now.
ReplyDeleteNothing wrong, just opting out!
ReplyDelete@ Victoria-
ReplyDeleteYou dare to opt out?!?
I'm going to push back a little because from my observations, you don't quit so easily in other threads. You usually have a lot to say and if you don't agree (which is quite often) you attempt to substantiate or clarify your arguments. I've even seen you extend an invitation to continue discussion in a separate forum. What is so different now? I'm quite disappointed that I haven't any clarity around your statement because you'd rather not participate. It is your choice, of course, but I challenge you to MAKE ME UNDERSTAND!
All,
ReplyDeleteI thought my points above were quite clear. I was not referencing sex education. Rather, make the point and seek insight. I do not believe that pornography and work should ever mesh! Period!!!
Schools are places of business, as well, and my questions to you, Satch, was as your role of parent, and you, Taj, as an educator, in helping me understand varying perspectives relative thereto.
If I ever learned that an employee, staff member, business associate ever brought pornography or sex in to a place of business for which I was a leader, inside or outside hours, no questions asked, it would be the end of that individual.
Hope that helps to clarify.
@Vic, thanks for continuing this convo.
ReplyDeleteAs a parent, I would be on a war path if my son's teacher brought sex into the classroom while my child is there. I don't have sex in front of my child, and I would be livid if anyone else did. I don't think using a school is a great example here though, because schools have children and children and sex don't mix. But, if my son's teacher was working at the school late, and there were no children around and said teacher decided to pop in a porno and get her rocks off, then I would have no problem with it. But, I'm not shy when it comes to sex. Sex doesn't bother me. Watching people have sex doesn't bother me. And if I owned a company and found an employee engaged in consensual sex with a partner, then I would simply excuse myself until they were finished. Sex can make people happier and happier people make better employees
I hear you, and respect your opinion, but it's not mine. Educators are held to different standards, not sure why, than other professionals, and are slapped across the front pages for things that get laughed off in other professions. I pointed out education for that very reason and thought does need to be given and as i would hate for a child to have to pay for an adults transgressions. A child's school should be a happy place....
ReplyDeleteHappy employees can be made at home, hotels, cars, etc...don't need the office, too!
@Victoria-
ReplyDeleteMy main confusion with your post addressed to me on December 9th, 2009 @ 4:34 pm was how me being a teacher and my views on pornography warranted the question of introducing sex in my particular place of business. I specifically stated in my post on that same day at 12:05 pm that the issue of sex publicly was a separate issue. I felt like you were questioning my integrity as a teacher, not necessarily as a woman who enjoys sex. And knowing how you feel about a teacher in a workplace further justifies that assumption...
Anyway, I'm glad you didn't bow out! Thanks for rejoining the convo!
Taj, I clarified my ask in general and specifically to you. No one was questioning anyone's integrity. You misunderstood my comments and I'm unsure as to how to make them anymore clear. Further, I'm not sure what your last sentence in paragraph one above means....but at this point truly am sorry I entered this thread and, specifically, indulged requests to re-engage.
ReplyDeleteTaj,
ReplyDeleteI think it wise to part amicably on this thread and agree to disagree. You are correct in the ambiguity of written text and latitude for misinterpretation. That was the sole reason I opted out initially. It just wasn't worth getting to a point of hurt feelings or misunderstanding. Again, no jabs were intended, no integrity questioned. I look forward to future banter.
No hurt feelings this way! I enjoyed the debate! Until the next heated post!!!
ReplyDelete