Okay, I’ve never got the whole thing about Christmas cards.
I’m not talking about the funny ones, I mean the serious “Here’s our life in a nutshell, updated” ones where you know the sender is hardcore into Christmas card writing and has about a thousand people to mail them to. Where at their house for a whole week it’s a Christmas card processing factory.
When I receive them, they don’t make me smile or feel warm inside, in fact, they make me feel the opposite. Cranky. Grinchy….lol
Yep, thanks for the thought and everything, but you should have saved the 2 trees, and $5.00 you spent on this whole thing for me and bought yourself a small cup of coffee at Starbucks instead. (I believe they call a small coffee a ‘petite’ at SBKS, don’t they?) I’d prefer your belly was warmer rather than the lost sentiment you spent on informing me that I should have a happy holiday and giving me an update on what your holiday plans are or whatever.
Knowing that you spent 4 minutes or less of your life on me doesn’t make my world any better. You could have spent that four minutes educating your children to say “himself” instead of “hisself”, finishing a car race mission on your Xbox, making love to your wife (or husband), walking your dog, pretty much anything better :)
It’s even a bit annoying for me the receiver - because now I have to decide when to throw that card out. All of a sudden I’m stressed out because someone sent me a card with a picture of their obnoxiously loud baby or of them and their dog in front of their Christmas tree. If I throw it out immediately, I suppose I’m evil. If I throw it out in 5 minutes, I’m still evil. If I throw it out in two days, I’m still evil. A week? Evil. When the hell do I throw it out then? Next Christmas? I never understand these things. I have boxes of damn birthday cards and Christmas cards stashed away somewhere not because they mean anything to me, but just because I didn’t throw them out, and six months after I received them I still didn’t know if it was okay to toss them.
There’s something also intrinsically creepy about the ’serious’ Christmas card. I bet when families send out the cards, there were at least three fights between the couple that sent them: One over which card to buy or photo to print, then an argument who to include on the list, then one disagreement over what the cards should say. Then the guy in the relationship gave up in exasperation because that’s what guys do.
Also, what is the point? I can see it when someone is far away and you rarely keep in touch with them and you want to say hi, but when you see someone each and every day at work or talk to them on the phone every week, why do you tell them “Have a Merry Christmas” in person, THEN send them a card? Who benefitted other than Hallmark on that sentimental exchange?
Funny Christmas cards serve a purpose though. They’re a good excuse to make someone laugh. Like, “See how I don’t take this stuff too seriously?” Or “I’m not like the people who get ridiculous over this shitty Xmas card enterprise.”
Ah, I guess I’m just a crusty hermit asshole that doesn’t deserve Christmas cards. Which is fine by me, the less time anyone spends on me the better because I just don’t get the whole thing. I find the entire things quite humorous!! :)
Save the trees and EMAIL me!!! ....lol
Perhaps that was the intention...playing mind games with the recipient knowing the guilt instilled and having a reminder of Aunt Betty each time you walk past that card on your desk wanting to throw it out but knowing Aunt Betty would shake her head...lmao! If I were going to send holiday greeting cards, which I don't, it would be to mess with folks and sit back laughing at how each recipient was dealing with whatever 'gift' I chose to impose. Nothing malicious, just humor and mind games...enough to stir a bit of trouble.
ReplyDeleteSeriously,though, even worse are those cards that contain a recount of the givers last year, along with pictures of the bad ass kid (one for each obnoxious event in every freakin' month of the year)!!! Give me a break! People need to spend more time, throughout the year, focused on the treasures of life and enjoying the friends they have rather than trying to cram it all in to a two week period at the end of the calendar yea. Guess that makes me a grinch, as well!